Questions….

There were anecdotal accounts and rumours aplenty as the financial crisis deepened last year, of individuals ruined by the crisis, taking their lives.  Some even going as far as saying the incident/s took place in high rise offices in the Central Business District.  In Singapore, imagine that.  Although, recent high profile incidents (God rest their souls) globally, might appear to give the rumour mill of urban myths, a believability quotient.

What drives a person to take his or her life?  I personally know of a few dear ones who have taken a similar route and believe me, there are many unanswered questions.

Was it desperation coupled with depression?  Perhaps, the inability to make sense of a system that used to make sense?  The problems were overwhelming and the pit, already deep, continues to spiral downwards?  The ignominy and hopelessness of the circumstance surrounding them?  Coming up against wall after insurmountable wall of deadends with nothing to look forward to?  There was nothing to live for?  There was noone to live for?  There was noone to help?  There was noone willing to help?  Or there was no help big enough on the way?  Did they ask for help?  Could they accept help?

Yet another question.  What makes a divorced, young mother of four school-going children, with bleak employment prospects and only ten cents in her purse, keep going?

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6 thoughts on “Questions….”

  1. A friend told me about an up and coming actress who ended her life in Paris. Sad indeed. I have a friend who is my age (let’s just say I am in the middle of “middle age”). She was diagnosed with cancer….went for chemotherapy and developed a life-threatening allergy to it. Now the doctors are deliberating what to do next. She is really between a rock and a hard place. Her children are in their late teens. I am sure she is determined to fight on despite the odds.
    Therein lies the irony of life….while there are those who would give anything to be able to live, others have decided to call it a day. Both categories of folks could be exactly the same predicament, but the response is very different.
    Herein also lies the enigma of life and our purpose on this earth. Are we here for the journey or to reach the end?

  2. Oh and just in case you didn’t know who I was, I’m the daughter of the aunty of beewhypea. Haha.

  3. Haha helloo (: I like your posts! Yeah, you could be a novelist or something. Write wuthering heights. Loll, hope you are having fun in shanghai! 😀

  4. All valid questions and I feel for those that have suffered and are suffering. We should acknowledge the tragedies around us. However I believe we should focus on the positives – your last paragraph – what can we learn from those who despite hard times, keep going.

    Perhaps the answer lies in each one of us making a conscious choice during the good times, and not so good times, to look for the positives. In every situation there are lessons to be learned; lessons being presented to us by what is happening each day in our lives. We each need to do our own “work”.

    Seligman, a specialist in this area, first wrote a book on “learned helplessness” which focused on why people reach rock bottom. Then 10 years later he wrote a book called “learned optimism” which uncovers the mirror attributes of optimists vs pessimists. Although I don’t subsribe to all his theories, in this book he has some useful insights on how optimists see he world e.g. a simple every day example would be “there is ALWAYS parking (even if I need to wait a little while)” vs “there is NEVER parking”. He is regarded as the father of the ‘psychology of positivity’ which is gaining in prominence.

    There’s an article today in the Straits Times on Michael J Fox and the TV show/book he’s published on being an incurable optimist, despite having Parkinson’s Disease. A friend of mine is dying of cancer, and she sends the most uplifting emails on her journey to as she works at it t remain positive despite her situation. Always looking upwards…

    PS: great provocative adlibs, keep it up!

  5. I had a school mate who ended his life when he was only 13 years old. At an age when we were at the threshold of becoming teenagers and trying to figure out what the real world held in store for us, he chose not to join the journey to adulthood and life. He was from a privileged background. I was shocked and indeed, there were many unanswered questions….even more so for a 13 year old.
    I can only guess that it must have been triggered by a major disappointment(s) leading to a sense of hopelessness….and they give up the “journey”. To draw an analogy to jogging, the first 5 minutes are probably the worse because your brain is screaming at you to stop torturing your already battered knees….if you sucumb, that’s the end. But if you persevere, you kind of get a second wind. That’s only my theory.

  6. hello ——.

    i like the layout, and wow; i knew you wrote well, but i didn’t know you were a wordsmith like that. like charles dicken’s long-lost daughter (in ref to both posts). haha, yes, well, that’s all i have to say so far.

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